I have a least favorite quote. It is some version of this: “Choose a job you love, and you will never have to work a day in your life.”
The notion is so overused that it provokes in me a physical reaction. Sometimes it is an eye-roll. At other points, muscle tension ensues. How is that possible? It is just a quote.
Perhaps convincing people that feeling stress at work is a referendum on their job choice rubs me the wrong way. Surprisingly, there is no definitive agreement on the quote’s origins. There are websites devoted to these things. Here is one of them. It is someone’s job to research quotes. Do the quote-researchers of the world ever “have to work a day in their life?” If so, is it because they did not choose a job they loved?
Vacation Deprivation
Vacation has different meanings depending upon your culture. Socioeconomic status also plays an important role. Some countries use the term “holiday” to denote extra time off. In the United States, we are notorious for our lack of paid time off (PTO). It is even worse for those who work hourly and must decide to choose between money and a well-deserved break. The stats below are for full-time employees who have worked for a year with their current employer. The statistics do not include part-time, hourly employees who often are not even afforded the “luxury” of public holidays.
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The Bright Side
On a positive note, there are pockets of hope. Some employers are providing relief to their workers. Here are a few links if you are hoping to hit the Holy Grail of unlimited PTO:
- 14 Awesome Companies With Unlimited Vacation Time
- 9 Companies That Offer Unlimited Vacation Days
- LinkedIn, Netflix, and 9 Other Companies With Unlimited Vacation Time
- More Companies Are Offering Paid Vacation. Should You?
Resisting my innate desire to be political, it should be noted that many cities and states struggle to guarantee workers paid sick leave, let alone paid vacation. The idea that people who get sick should not have to choose between work and recovering from illness is often considered overly liberal. This in the United States, the richest country in the world! After all, businesses need to make a profit. (Oops. That was political.)
How To Make Vacation Last
Regardless of whether or not we are fortunate enough to have unlimited days off, a plurality of us will need to work at some point in our lives. Many people even continue to do so in some form during retirement.
Writing during the last hours of a two-week vacation, this post is as much for my benefit as for yours. A firm believer in community, I encourage you to leave your thoughts in the comment section below. Maybe, working together, we can help one another enjoy our lives even more!
With vacation from work not even in the rear-view mirror, some important realizations have come to the fore.
Vacation In Perspective
- Some vacations are life-changing. These are the ones we live for, even if we chose the right career. Whether visiting an exotic location or something less grand, how we enjoy vacation time is personal and individual. The Internet ideates travel and who knows if the Internet idealists are being honest in their posts and recollections. I wrote a post about that HERE. Regardless of what perfect means to you, there are very few life experiences better than that perfect vacation.
- Vacations can be debacles. We have all experienced this. Even when I did not have the finances to travel, a day off or two that I had hyped in my mind could be easily derailed. Bad weather, poor choice of travel companions, financial stress, and other factors can turn a dream into a nightmare. Or at the very least, not as enjoyable as hoped. Read about my somewhat failed trip to Brussels in this post. It was fantastic compared to some of my worst vacations.
- Vacations include boredom. In my opinion, being bored is underrated. As a matter of fact, studies have shown that without boredom we stifle creativity. Just last week, I made an executive decision to forgo a few hours at a well-known beach to go for a ride to see a lighthouse. When we arrived, it was quiet, picturesque, and relaxing. Strolling along the water, we climbed on some easy-to-traverse rocks for a better view. It was simple family time together. When we met back up with our travel companions, their children raved about the carousel at the beach and how much fun they had at the beach. What child wouldn’t? To my delight, our eight-year old daughter excitedly exclaimed, “We climbed rocks!”
- Vacation is mostly about mindset. Mindset is always important in our daily lives. Having been part of the education world my whole career, the study of growth mindset is one of many trends. It is a good one as far as educational trends go, but I fear that we will misuse it. However, I will take that risk.
- We mimic “real life” during our vacations. This one is big. As much as we enjoy new experiences on vacation, a large percentage of our time is spent doing the same activities and tasks done while working. Meals, cleaning, self-care, exercise, reading books or online articles, socializing with friends, and even sleeping. The main difference is that we are on vacation. I want my vacation mindset to last!
Help Me Create An Endless Vacation
Below is a list of strategies and ideas, in no particular order, that I hope will help make my vacation mindset endless. Again, please leave comments below or on social media. Let’s make this a living list that we can refer to in our darkest hours at work, even if we DID choose a job we love!
- Relive your best vacation moments with friends and family.
- Plan small getaways, even if just a day-trip or a local walk. Research shows that looking forward to vacation is as important as the actual vacation itself!
- Enjoy your meals (even lunches!) as you did while you were away from work.
- Try not to take work home with you. By working more efficiently, you may be able to cut down on unfinished projects that require attention at home. Maybe some days it will seem like a micro-vacation when your work day is over.
- Do not check email after work, if your job allows for that. It is actually bad for your health.
- Do not send emails after work hours if you are in a leadership position. You have the ability to enhance your employees health and productivity. Even if odd hours are the only time you have to write the emails, save them as drafts and send them during work hours or use a scheduler to send them.
- Go for short walks during your work day, even if they are inside. Physical activity can help unburden your mind. Getting outside into nature is a bonus!
- Bring vacation to your workplace. Display vacation photos or use them as backgrounds on your computer and phones. If you work outdoors or in different locations, try something different on your way to work. Maybe listen to a vacation podcast or music from your favorite destination or band.
- Try positive daily affirmations. This idea seemed ridiculous to me for years. There are thousands of these online and in books. Even if they don’t work for you, maybe you will laugh at them, as I used to. Right now, I watch a nine-minute YouTube video in the morning. It has calming photos in the background and the woman’s voice seems soothing. The affirmations are certainly better than my previous morning routine—obsessing over the day ahead!
- Don’t take work problems so seriously (at least internally). I say internally, as nobody wants to appear as if they don’t care. This is my most difficult challenge. I am never embarrassed to admit my personal struggles with stress. Keeping a sense of humor in the tough times is probably my number one goal. If not accomplished, the other ideas on this list will be mostly futile.
Please leave your thoughts and suggestions in the comment section below or on my social media posts. You might just help someone live an endless vacation, or at least cheer them up for a moment!
~Kevin
In My Unexpected Life, I share stories, thoughts, and simple ideas to entertain and possibly inspire others to become more connected with each other in conversation, food, travel, and more…no matter how big or small those experiences may be.
Get outside every day – listen and look for things that you may notice on vacation when you are at home – bunnies, birds, stars, little things can be big things 🙂
Great advice, Gretchen. Noticing little things is sometimes difficult when we get too far inside our own heads! Many times I drive by the bay here and don’t even appreciate it.
Really enjoy the positive perspective of this post, Kevin! As you well know, there are many travel bloggers who are permanently on vacation, and it can sometimes inspire massive envy on my part. But I think every situation has its pros and cons, and mine helps me appreciate the vacations I manage to take and it encourages me to do more with my weekends. As you highlighted here, small moments matter!
Thanks for your thoughts! I am one to be skeptical about the idea that the people you mention are always on vacation. Especially considering the amount of time it takes to keep up with just this simple blog. LOL! Thank you for reading.
I love this positive post-Kevin, you’re not only a simple writer but you’re really an educator.
The number 7 helps me through the years. I started to do biking, running and or walking like my ME time. Planning a vacation helps me to look forward to the next one.
With regards to the work status, I honestly don’t know how my husband handles it. Him being the Senior developer at work and sometimes he got calls from his boss to work on something. Or even sometimes he is at home he works during weekends even without pay if his brain is working to do the programming or if he has any ideas to put on the site.
Everything you said is true here but I honestly wonder now as I never heard from him complaining about his work.
For us, we choose his work now over the other one because of the flexibility to work from home if he needs to. He can easily get out at his work if he needs to attend us.
Money is helpful but the flexibility to be with your family in times of need and or emergency is very important to us. For others who might be reading this choose flexibility over money. You can learn to budget your earnings but it’s hard to be in a very strict company especially if you have family and small children.
Such good points about the difference between working at home as opposed to a hectic office, April. It sounds like although your husband is very busy, you both take care of your health and your family. That is a great work-life balance!
I totally agree that vacation is about mindset. You can have a lovely trip planned and have it be disappointing or amazinf – all depending on one’s mindset. Great post!
Thanks, Jamie! Trips are so subjective and we never know how it is going to turn out. I just hope to keep making positive memories.
We climbed rocks! Love it! Great tips on creating a mini vacation every day. I know many people who lose PTO hours every year because they don’t use their vacation days (that was never me). I’m a big fan of bleisure travel where you tack on a few days before or after a business trip to explore the area beyond those four walls of a conference room.
That’s a great idea about tacking on a day or two and I never heard the term “bleisure.” You are SO right about people not taking their time off. I think the time away is more important and that efficiency can make up for any time “missed” from work.
Small getaways have become the important vacation for me. If it’s just a day spent an hour away from home, it helps clear our minds. Sometimes those little trips that are a day or two feel like a week (in a good way) and bring a freshness to our home.
Such a great point, Justin! It is amazing how long short trips can feel and vice versa.
Great ideas! I agree that disconnecting from work is really important. I just recently had to work long hours for 7 days a week for about three months. It was insane. At the end of that time I started to make mistakes, forget that I had done things, and was incredibly “zappy” or wound up. This experience has taught me to appreciate the simple gift of having a day off. If we are not at work, we need to try to mentally close the door on it and just be free to enjoy our time off. Even if it’s simply to climb rocks outside in the fresh air and sunshine. Sounds lovely!
Thank you for reading and for your comment, Fiona! Those long stretched are the ones that get me too. You are completely correct about how many mistakes we can make and how forgetful we can be if we don’t refresh ourselves.
Sadly, workers have to go into work sick and then get coworkers sick. I love the idea of making your vacations last longer.
It is sad about people going into work sick. I often do it out of guilt. 🙁
You know, I love the thing about positive affirmations! For a while I started every day with positive affirmations, and I thought it would feel really cheesy and stupid, but it actually felt kind of great. It was so nice to just do something generous for myself like that. Highly recommend!
I liked a lot of your suggestions for retaining the holiday mindset in your daily life. It’s important to have real breaks, and travel is fantastic, but those things aren’t always possible. This is a great compromise!
Thanks Laura! Yup…the positive affirmations were a tough sell for me. There was even a day when I was repeating some of the words back sarcastically. LOL! I’m going to keep giving new things a try, because it is better than trudging along between holidays. 🙂
Two things! I love your 8 years old daughter for saying, “we climbed rocks!” I’ll take the picturesque lighthouse over a popular beach too.
And you touched on a very important point, that bosses should refrain from sending emails after hours. I have friends who’re badly troubled by it. They feel like they can’t rest properly, whether after hours or when they’re sick at home.
I enjoyed reading this post! Thank you. 🙂
Thanks for your kind words. My daughter’s quote was great because she was so genuinely proud and happy. 🙂 And the email control for bosses is so important! As part of my job I made the decision to refrain from sending emails to employees after work hours because I noticed how many of them had Apple watches or work email notifications on their phones. It occurred to me that even though the emails didn’t need to be answered, my employees might feel obligated to do so or, at the very least, it would remind them of work when they should be enjoying themselves.
She’s proud and happy for the right things too. 🙂 A kid’s ability to enjoy nature is precious these days.
I gotta say, your employees have a great boss! The anxious type would definitely get set off by an email from the boss. Wish more bosses were like you. 🙂
Thank you for this perspective!!! I wish I could travel more though 🙂
I think almost everyone wishes they could travel more! The trick is keeping a mindset of wonder in our everyday lives. One that I have not mastered yet, unfortunately. But I am always trying!
A few points: First, I love your daughters’ matching dresses, God protect them. Secondarily, I don’t agree with the “Choose a job you love….” quote because I actually love my job and I work from home but I work very hard and don’t escape the stress the results despite the fact that my work reflects my inner purpose and is my passion. Third, I take a lot of action on purpose to keep balanced and enjoy this experience of life. I enjoy my surroundings and try to diversify my activies which keep things fresh and vaction-ey. Finally, these affirmations vids are very helpful and I’m enjoying the one you shared now!
All great points! Thank you so much for your input and I am glad that you are able to keep balance and enjoy life so much. 🙂
Being Ugandan, I can relate to the notion of working all your life without pause. Africa’s hand to mouth culture impedes vacationing to a level you cannot imagine. Thanks for this .
Thank you for your perspective and for reading my post, Justin! I am glad you were able to relate.
This is truly a fantastic article! I just got back from a 17 day vacation (although it wasn’t really the lazing around and relaxing type of vacation) and I know how tough it is to go back to work. The lack of vacation days in the United States is terrible, especially when you meet Europeans who get like a month of vacation every year! Anyways I like your tips for keeping the mindset fresh, even when we’re trapped into the dreaded corporate office.
Thanks for reading this, Michael! You are completely on point about meeting people from other countries and how it changes perspective on the American viewpoint of vacations. Somehow, we Americans even feel guilty about taking our time off, even when we have it, instead of just enjoying it.
Totally unaware of the difference in annual leave, us Brits do well with this and it still never feels enough. Great post.
The difference is surprising and even more so in the amount of time people are entitled to and don’t take. It is a shame, really. All we can do is try to encourage people to stand up for themselves and hopefully this will improve with time.
This is such an important post! I just got back from a vacation myself and the tips you’ve given here really resonate with me. The point I loved the most is how being bored is underrated. That is so true! I think it’s very important for us to be bored once in a while. Great post!
Thank you so much for reading this and for your thoughts, Shalvika! I wrote this after returning from a vacation this summer and I am still trying to keep the feeling alive. Especially on my morning walks, where the world is a little bit more quiet and “vacation-like.” 🙂
Loved this post! I’m 16 and just started high school (the system is different in Sweden) and everything is so much more stressful which can be a lot. Something that really makes me motivated is to look forward to vacations and knowing that I’ll soon be on my way to a new adventure! Or just having small things planned in the near future or in the weekends makes me more motivated as well! I love having things to look forward to. And not only feel trapped in a bubble that school is my life, because it’s just a part of it. Anyways, really great article!
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Portland looks beautiful!
I love the idea that lack of boredom stifles creativity. Sometimes if we’re bored we think something is wrong, but that’s not necessarily the case.
And yeah, it’s true that “wherever you go, there you are”. Ordinary life and all the tasks of daily living are with you even on the beaches of Thailand! I guess that’s why it’s a good idea, like you said, to incorporate the good parts of a vacation into everyday life.
Thank you for reading and for your kind thoughts! Interesting that you bring up the beaches of Thailand, because I think everyone imagines those as being “away from everything,” but it all depends on what “away” means.
What a great perspective – I really enjoyed reading this post.
Thank you for taking the time to read it!
My pleasure 😊
Lots of good ideas to think about after reading your post. I certainly like that idea of taking your vacation with you to work by having holiday pictures as a screen saver. It will probably be quite soothing during stressful times at work. I, too, believe that going for short walks are quite beneficial, even if it is just two minutes to step outside to feel the fresh air!
Thanks for reading and for your comment! It is definitely nice to have travel reminders posted around the workplace, especially during stressful times. And, walks almost always help!
For me, a lot of the joy of travel is getting out of the usual places and routines, and doing things differently. Eating different food, waking and going to bed at different times, sleeping in a different bed, trying to use a different shower (it never ceases to amaze me how many designs have been invented for turning on a shower). I’ve read articles by brain experts who have proven that doing things differently is good for our brains, much better than following set routines on ‘autopilot’. It actually creates new neural pathways in our brain that make it more powerful. No wonder holidays leave us feeling refreshed! So at home, I try as much as possible to introduce new things into my daily routine and not just follow the same old, same old. When I pay attention to everything I do, it’s quite shocking to realise how much I do without thinking or even noticing that I’m doing it. Conscious living and plenty of change can be almost as good as a holiday 🙂
Thanks for the insight, Carole! That is some good advice that I will try.